My pal Jimmy
Jan. 13th, 2004 04:46 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hippybngstockngI'm doing okay, but I got some sad news that got me thinking.
My Uncle and Aunt's eight year old ginormous black mutt of a dog Jim passed away suddenly last night of a softball sized tumor in his abdomen. No one had any clue he was sick until he suddenly had trouble breathing in the early evening. He seemed to get over it for a while, but within hours he was gone.
People may call it nuts, but I feel the death of pets the same as I feel the death of people because in my mind and heart it's really the same thing. Every animal I have ever known has been different than the next. I like to get to know all of them, give them all a scritch, let them sniff my hand and make a new friend. I have a billion friends all over the world that will now know my smell if we ever cross paths again, all usually very friendly which is more than I can say for the billions of people who have crossed my path.
I understand when people are not as into interacting with animals as I am. Different people like different things, and I am not going to start liking football just because it seems like everyone in the known universe seems to like it so much, so I wouldn't ask someone who doesn't like animals much to run out and find a dog to roll around with.
However, when people get snarky about people being sad when a pet dies I really want to smack them with a newspaper. There is the usual statement of "It was just a dog" and "they can get another one" which are both true statements, but it still doesn't change the fact that it is Jimmy who is gone, and he was not just any dog. My Uncle's email sounded like he was embarrassed that he was sharing what for him I know is very painful news. I wish he didn't have to feel embarrassed, but I know why he does. People should be sensitive to people with pets when the pet dies as much as if it was a family member because to a pet owner it truly is the same thing. And the pet owner should not have to feel shame at feeling sad. If anyone out there ever has a pet die and they want someone to feel sorry for them, look me up, I am here, I understand.
Jimmy's tail was at coffee table height and it was always in motion. He knew about 75 words which is easily double what your average dog knows. He was fond of carrots and shaving cream, both of which he sought out insatiably. He would announce the comings and goings of anyone within a five block radius, and could warn you of oncoming ambulances before you even knew they were coming. He was also the most loving dog you ever met. He was too big to fit on a couch, so he would back up and put his butt up next to you and continue to stand with his front legs on the floor. He would run into the room if he heard you laughing and always seemed to want you to repeat the joke for his benefit. He took very good care of my Uncle and Aunt, and they of him, despite the fact that he was originally a gift given to their youngest son by a former girlfriend.
You can't tell me that Jimmy was just a dog more than you could tell me that your mom was just a mom. I'll be okay, but I feel sorry for my Aunt and Uncle, and for myself because I know my poor Betty is going to have that same night sometime soon. She's doing really well right now, but I can see the changes starting, and I can see the end of the road though it is still a few blocks away. It's sometimes really hard for me, knowing she is sick, but I also get embarrassed about talking about it.
I really love my dog and I'm never sorry about that.
My Uncle and Aunt's eight year old ginormous black mutt of a dog Jim passed away suddenly last night of a softball sized tumor in his abdomen. No one had any clue he was sick until he suddenly had trouble breathing in the early evening. He seemed to get over it for a while, but within hours he was gone.
People may call it nuts, but I feel the death of pets the same as I feel the death of people because in my mind and heart it's really the same thing. Every animal I have ever known has been different than the next. I like to get to know all of them, give them all a scritch, let them sniff my hand and make a new friend. I have a billion friends all over the world that will now know my smell if we ever cross paths again, all usually very friendly which is more than I can say for the billions of people who have crossed my path.
I understand when people are not as into interacting with animals as I am. Different people like different things, and I am not going to start liking football just because it seems like everyone in the known universe seems to like it so much, so I wouldn't ask someone who doesn't like animals much to run out and find a dog to roll around with.
However, when people get snarky about people being sad when a pet dies I really want to smack them with a newspaper. There is the usual statement of "It was just a dog" and "they can get another one" which are both true statements, but it still doesn't change the fact that it is Jimmy who is gone, and he was not just any dog. My Uncle's email sounded like he was embarrassed that he was sharing what for him I know is very painful news. I wish he didn't have to feel embarrassed, but I know why he does. People should be sensitive to people with pets when the pet dies as much as if it was a family member because to a pet owner it truly is the same thing. And the pet owner should not have to feel shame at feeling sad. If anyone out there ever has a pet die and they want someone to feel sorry for them, look me up, I am here, I understand.
Jimmy's tail was at coffee table height and it was always in motion. He knew about 75 words which is easily double what your average dog knows. He was fond of carrots and shaving cream, both of which he sought out insatiably. He would announce the comings and goings of anyone within a five block radius, and could warn you of oncoming ambulances before you even knew they were coming. He was also the most loving dog you ever met. He was too big to fit on a couch, so he would back up and put his butt up next to you and continue to stand with his front legs on the floor. He would run into the room if he heard you laughing and always seemed to want you to repeat the joke for his benefit. He took very good care of my Uncle and Aunt, and they of him, despite the fact that he was originally a gift given to their youngest son by a former girlfriend.
You can't tell me that Jimmy was just a dog more than you could tell me that your mom was just a mom. I'll be okay, but I feel sorry for my Aunt and Uncle, and for myself because I know my poor Betty is going to have that same night sometime soon. She's doing really well right now, but I can see the changes starting, and I can see the end of the road though it is still a few blocks away. It's sometimes really hard for me, knowing she is sick, but I also get embarrassed about talking about it.
I really love my dog and I'm never sorry about that.
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no subject
Date: 2004-01-13 04:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-13 05:54 pm (UTC)As tafkar mentioned, I lost my cat yesterday - my mother had her put down, and only told me after the fact - and I'm a total wreck about it.
Don't be embarrassed talking about Betty. She's not just a dog - she's *your* dog, and that makes all the difference in the world.
Purrette might have lived with my parents, but she was still *my* cat.
no subject
Date: 2004-01-14 06:04 am (UTC)I had a very similar experience to yours with my cat Dahlia- She wasn't put to sleep, but my mother didn't tell me how sick she really was until after she died in her arms during a blood draw. My only comfort is that Dahlia did die in my mom's arms, but I knew in Dahlia's heart that it would have been better had it been me because she was truly my cat. The only reason she was still living with my mom was because I was still living at school and while we had tried having her live there it had never quite worked out because I could never trust the people I lived with to not let her out, and I couldn't trust her to not convince them that they ought to... She was crafty :)
I'm so sorry about your cat, when I found out about Dahlia I let out a scream that people heard in the next building. A friend thought one of my parents had died, but to me it felt WORSE than if my parent had died because Dahlia and I were closer than that. So If YOU would like a hug IN PERSON, and if you don't have any cats available to squeeze to make you feel better, feel free to give me a yell. I have 2, and know that at least one of them would be happy to occupy your lap and let her motor run for a while, and leave you with a fine coating of hair to take home :)
I'm doing pretty well though, since Betty is doing pretty well as I said. I am remaining positive that we caught on to her kidney disease early enough that we will be able to stay on the comfort side of the illness as long as possible. I am also comforted to a certain extent because I know I've been through this before (though admittedly with a cat) so I know what signs mean that the end is really near and that hope is really going away and I can make the decision of putting to sleep or not and feel okay about it. With Meerkat I didn't put him to sleep and while he died in my arms and that was good, I know he had wanted out of his body for weeks at that point so I feel bad about not doing it sooner in some ways. I can understand why you are a wreck though, and if you want someone to talk to about it, please do think of me. It sucks that your mom didn't tell you before she did it. You should have had a chance to be there since there was the chance, and I know exactly how that feels.
*HUGS*
*hug*
Date: 2004-01-13 06:34 pm (UTC)*hug*
Re: *hug*
Date: 2004-01-14 06:14 am (UTC)I don't think it's weird to name a person after a dog, especially if it was a really cool dog.
no subject
Date: 2004-01-13 06:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-01-14 06:09 am (UTC)They make such a difference in your life. I am often puzzled by how people can't be affected by an animal after all the ones I've known. Heck, I even miss my fish a little even though I can't remember all their names ;)
no subject
Date: 2004-01-13 07:11 pm (UTC)You have my profoundest sympathy.
no subject
Date: 2004-01-16 08:28 am (UTC)I like your journal- can I add you as a friend? I need more writing friends :) Especially SF writing friends!
I 'm and old friend of tafkar, and I like to think I am pretty cool, and I'm housebroken for the most part ;)
Thanks again for the sympathy.